Do you know how to flirt? It turns out a lot of us have no idea.

Research shows about 36% of men and 18% of women don’t know how to flirt at all.

If you’re one of them, here are some flirting tips we’re sure can help you up your dating game.

Before we begin, here’s one thing you need to remember. It doesn’t matter if you’re a man or a woman. You need to think about flirting for what it is—a game.

By doing so, you realize that sometimes you win and sometimes you lose. If you win, great. If you don’t, you don’t have to take it so seriously.

By applying what we tell you in this flirting guide, you can increase your chances of winning in this fun, exciting game.

Flirty Tips for Girls

Got someone you’re interested in but can’t quite seem to catch his attention? Here are some ideas for you.

Start with a joke.

Hit the ground running by opening with a tease or a joke. This shows anyone you’re flirting with that you’re fun and playful to be around.

Watch your body language.

What you don’t say your body language gives away. Men love it when you look them in the eye for a brief second, smile, and then look away shyly. It’s the come-hither signal they can’t refuse.

Don’t give too much right away.

This is one of the flirt ideas you tend to hear about the most. And it’s for a good reason. If he asks for your number and you give it to him, don’t text him first. If he does text, don’t answer right away.

Pro tip: Don’t give away your life story right off the bat. You want to seem a bit mysterious and a little hard to get.

Be friendly.

The hair-twirling and eyelash-batting you read in magazines? They don’t work. Men, especially older men, go after women who are friendly and respectful without being coquettish.

Flirt Tips for Guys

All of the above work for guys, but we have a few more tips for you because, for some reason, men find it more difficult to flirt.

Keep it simple.

The first, most cardinal rule for every man who wants to flirt is—and we can’t say this strongly enough—Do not. Ever. Use a pickup line.

Every woman we know has a horror story about the worst pickup line she’s ever heard.

If you’re not sure what to say to a woman, start with the basics. Say hello, tell her your name, and ask if you can buy her a drink because you think she’s pretty. This works far more often than you think.

Be a gentleman.

Yes, women can open their own doors, pay for their own dinners, and pull out their own chairs. But if you ask women if they think these gestures are passé, they usually say no.

These gestures means you’re trying to make a good impression because you see her as more than just a one-time flirtation.

Bonus points if you’re a gentleman to strangers, like opening a door for an older lady, for example.

Be confident.

Ladies love a confident man. And if you’re not one, at least act like one. Being confident and taking the lead in the conversation means you’re relaxed enough to talk to her without sweating through your shirt.

Don’t forget your manners.

Ladies expect you to know and understand social graces. For example, if you’re texting a potential date, women expect more from you than a rainbow fist bump emoji.

Also, please be subtle. Just like you don’t want a woman batting her eyelashes at you like an ingénue, she doesn’t want to see you winking at her and dropping sexual innuendos.

The Takeaway

Don’t be discouraged if your flirting doesn’t work out as planned at first. With time and practice, you’ll get more comfortable flirting with other people at the right time in all the right places.

Who knows? You might land yourself a great date and, perhaps, even a happy long-term relationship after.